4:13 Podcast: Can I Start Fresh Even When Life Is a Mess? With Rashawn Copeland [Episode 130]

Jennifer Rothschild: As a young man, Rashawn Copeland experienced both the tragedy of gun violence and the fortune of playing college football. He ended up in Los Angeles living the Hollywood dream, but he was miserable. And one day, he found himself sitting in a room holding a gun to his mouth, wishing that he could just escape the unhappiness that he had felt for so many years. It was then that God reached into his heartache and gave him a fresh start. And I cannot wait for you to hear from this amazing man on the 4:13 today, author Rashawn Copeland. He's going to give you all you need to start over, to start fresh, right where you are. And, he anchors his guidance in Scripture, and he shows you how to start your walk with God now, no matter where you are. So, KC, you got to crank up the music, my brother, because hope is on the way.

KC Wright: Let's do this. Welcome to the 4:13 Podcast, where practical encouragement and biblical wisdom set you up to live the "I Can" life because you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Now, here she is, my soul sister, Jennifer Rothschild.

Jennifer Rothschild: Hey, this is Jennifer. And my goal is just to help you be and do all that God has called you to be and do as you learn to live this "I Can" life of Philippians 4:13. My friends, you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. That was my seeing-eye guy, KC, and we got our coffee. We are ready for a good day. And it's better because you are here.

KC Wright: Yes.

Jennifer Rothschild: I'm telling you, friends, it just ... we have found that every time that we meet with you guys for a podcast, our lives just get happier and better.

KC Wright: We love being with you.

Jennifer Rothschild: We do.

KC Wright: We love doing life with you. And, you know, this podcast has changed my life, too. There's no defeat anywhere in me because I got this "I Can" earworm all the time.

Jennifer Rothschild: Yes, you're always hearing it, right?

KC Wright: I hear it all the time.

Jennifer Rothschild: Yes. Well, OK. But I just have to pause here, KC, because ...

KC Wright: Come on ...

Jennifer Rothschild: You've had to have this good attitude. Our friends don't know this story. OK, but I think we're past it far enough that you can tell. Sorry, I'm not laughing at it. It's not funny. It is not funny, ladies and gentlemen.

KC Wright: It is funny.

Jennifer Rothschild: It is funny.

KC Wright: It's really funny.

Jennifer Rothschild: So, KC, now, I know this happened a couple of months ago, but you have got to tell them what you were doing in your kitchen with your child's toy. OK, that's your setup. Now tell us what happened.

KC Wright: My daughter has a little cherry red hoverboard, and she zips around the home all the time on it. Zip, zip, zip, zip, zip! She's cute. She's tiny. She just flies, right.

Jennifer Rothschild: Like a little fairy.

KC Wright: She's always the fastest neighbor to the mailbox, right. OK, well, Daddy thought he would get on and do a little zipping and show her how it's done, and I take her ice skating all the time, and I never fall. But what took me down was the hoverboard in my kitchen. It threw me off like a bull, and I landed on my right arm and broke my arm. And, so, if you can't hover, stay out of the kitchen. And I currently have a hoverboard for sale, if you're interested. It comes with an autographed sling and some bubble wrap because you're going to need it.

Jennifer Rothschild: Oh, my gosh. And when you told me, KC, because you were coming back from the hospital, urgent care, wherever you went, I mean, I was having so much trouble not laughing my head off because of the way you were describing the whole incident...

KC Wright: At the visual.

Jennifer Rothschild: Yeah. And then you even go into urgent care and you're like, "OK, I know I'm not a doctor ..."

KC Wright: Yeah.

Jennifer Rothschild: But I think, you know, and the doctor's like, "I'll be the doctor."

KC Wright: Oh, yeah. I was trying to convince them, listen, it's just inflamed. It's sore. Nothing's wrong. And the doctor's like, "Yeah, I'll be the judge of that." And several x-rays later, he's like, "Yes, you did a great job. You broke that right arm." So it's not been fun. But I'll tell you, I was on my way in to do the morning show here and in our city the very next morning. And I'm driving with one hand. My other arm is in pain, and it's in a sling, and there is a billboard right by my house on the interstate that says: Put Your Positive Pants On. And I'm like if that wasn't a word from the Lord for me! So that was my "I Can" message from the Lord that morning.

Jennifer Rothschild: You can put on your positive pants, but with a broken arm, it takes five hours.

KC Wright: Oh, come on.

Jennifer Rothschild: I mean, wow. And what's funny, y'all, is we both broke our arms ...

KC Wright: I know!

Jennifer Rothschild: Well, mine was my wrist.

KC Wright: Yeah.

Jennifer Rothschild: But we did it at the same time of the year. See! We are like separated at birth. You are the boy version of me.

KC Wright: We're morphing.

Jennifer Rothschild: I know, it's weird. But I'll tell you one other thing, KC. Though, the whole time, y'all, that he was dealing with his broken arm and his hoverboard escapade ...

KC Wright: Yeah.

Jennifer Rothschild: I always, though, KC, and I appreciate this about you, I always hear a smile in your voice. I always do. And, it reminded me, I literally thought about you when I was having this conversation with Rashawn because he also, I mean, I could tell he was smiling. I could literally hear his smile the whole time that we were talking, and his smile was so loud. And I just thought, what an awesome picture of God's grace and humility. I mean, when you can hear a smile in someone's voice, that's really a gift. And so through your broken arm, I always hear you smiling. But I just wanted to let you guys know as you hear Rashawn, you're going to hear his smile. And I just think that's a beautiful intangible. So let's just ... let's just listen in.

KC Wright: Well, let's meet Rashawn. Rashawn Copeland is the founder of I'm So Blessed Daily and Without Walls Ministries. A writer for church leaders, God TV, and the God's Not Dead blog, he is also the host of the Scripture and Stories podcast on the Converge Podcast Network. He also serves on the Life Church YouVersion Bible App Team with Pastor Craig Groeschel. He's a graduate of the University of Central Oklahoma and is currently earning his Master's of Divinity at Liberty University. He lives in Oklahoma City with his wife Denisse and their three children. So settle in, my friend, for a great conversation between Jennifer and Rashawn.

Jennifer Rothschild: All right, my friend, I want to hear your story. I know a little bit of it, but I want our listeners to hear. So, I want you to start kind of with being a kid. Like did you grow up in a Christian home? And then I want you to hit this time in your life. I think you might have been a teenager when you experienced some gun violence. So, kind of tell us this part of your story.

Rashawn Copeland: Yes, definitely, Jennifer. And again, thank you so much for having me. You're a hero to me, and I really look forward to connecting more. But, as far as my story, I'm so thankful God rewrites our stories because I was so far from Him, and I don't deserve to be where I am now. But by the grace of God, He captured me, you know, with His love and His grace and His mercy.

I remember years ago, it sort of started out, which it felt, where I was trying to prove myself to everyone at all times. And it was stretching me, you know because I really began that sort of journey in my life after a fourth-grade teacher told me to never pick up a pen and write again. So at that point, I was like, OK, like that rejection sort of propelled me into like, I'm going to prove myself that I can do so much. And I just remember getting so prideful after a while when I got in high school, and I was a student-athlete, and I was really successful at it, you know. I was one of the top in not only my city but in the state. And I began to get scholarships across the country to different schools. So, things were looking up.

But, sadly, a lot of it -- something was about to go down -- because my pride drove me into the ground. As I was at this park one night after this game, I was hanging out with this young lady who I was in love with. And, as we're sitting here at this park after dark, you know, there was a phone call she got and me being the prideful, egotistical guy, future college football star, I grabbed her phone because I knew it was her ex-boyfriend, and I answer it. So, and then I was, "Hello." And then, as this guy gets on the phone, he basically says, "I don't know where you are, but I'm going to come find you tonight. And why are you with my girl?" And I began the wrestling match with him over the phone, saying, "This is my girl. What are you talking about?" Like, and we went back and forth, but all of a sudden, you know, I should have never did this, he asked where were we. And I told them where we were and, we were at this park and, you know, I hang up the phone on him. And that was not a wise thing to do, which was give him our location.

So, out of nowhere, you know, 10 minutes later, after we're talking and, you know, going back and forth, a van pulls in. This van pulls in, and they park across the parking lot. Five guys jump out of that van. I frantically get out of the car. But, yet again, still pridefully because I was trying to hold it down in honor of this girl. And as I'm walking towards them and they're walking towards me, my heart's beating out of my chest, my mind is racing. This guy reaches for his waistband, and he waves a pistol in the air. And at this moment, I'm scared out of my mind. I turn, I run, and I slip, and I fall.

He stands over me. Boom, boom. Two gunshots. And yeah, those gunshots rang out. And the best I knew how I got up off the ground, and I ran, and I dove at the left side of the car, and the passenger door was wide open. And to my surprise, the girl was gone. The van had killed out. I was in fear that they were going to come over and finish me off. So, I'm just laying on this cold cement, scared out of my mind and warm blood began to come up my back, and I was just at this lowest point, and it was so painful and dark, and nobody was there to save me. My coaches weren't there. My friends weren't there. My crazy cousins, my family, no one was there. The girl was gone. And I had to call out to the God of the universe the first time ever that I barely knew -- I knew of. But I didn't know Him. But He met me there that night, and it changed everything for me. But yeah, that's sort of the start.

Jennifer Rothschild: Wow.

Rashawn Copeland: Crazy time.

Jennifer Rothschild: Well, Rashawn, I mean, that, well, I'm going to just ask you a plain just curiosity question, but then I want to take it deeper. So, did you know you were shot originally when you were able then to just scramble to get to the side of the car before you felt the blood? Did you know you were shot? Did you feel it?

Rashawn Copeland: You know what, I did not know I was actually shot. That adrenaline ... I was more thirsty, you know. Because of -- I don't know why -- I went in sort of like shock. I was in so much shock. I didn't know I was shot. I, literally, I was trying to figure out what was going on. It just happened all so fast. And the only reason I found out I was shot is because, as I'm laying on this cold cement, looking up, you know, my mind is racing and scrambling everywhere. The only thing that alerted me was this warm blood was coming up my back. And that was when I had an even bigger panic attack because I knew I was shot at that point. Like, I don't want to die here. I don't want to die. Did I ever live? Like, you know, that's the question I had.

Jennifer Rothschild: Well, how did you get from that point to a hospital? How did you actually get out of that situation?

Rashawn Copeland: You know what, it took about 15, maybe 10 to 15 more minutes, but that felt like an eternity, you know, laying on the ground on the verge of death. And I just remember, you know, what was amazing is like even though I didn't know God, He's so faithful and good to even answer, like to respond to the cry of my heart knowing I needed help. He, unknowingly, like from my standpoint, sent this guy who I call an angel out of nowhere, who came in a pickup truck and picked me up and threw me in the truck and drove me to the hospital. And they said I lost a lot of blood. I wasn't supposed to live past that night. That's what they were saying. But, you know how the story goes, God is so gracious. Like, He saved me and gave me life.

Jennifer Rothschild: Quite literally, spiritually and physically. He has saved you and given you life, and what a life. OK, so you had said you were a football player, and you had football scholarships. You were going to play college ball. Did you recover well enough to actually play football? Because I know you ended up living in L.A.

Rashawn Copeland: Yeah, yeah. So, after that, the process of recovery, it took so much like physical therapy and mentally getting myself together. And because, you know, everything was stripped after that. All the scholarships were gone. Everything felt like the idols of my life were all benched. They all died. And what was amazing is it helped me to lift my eyes up to God again. But I'm thankful that He restored me and also redeemed, you know, the football sort of journey I was on. And I ended up going to junior college, playing there for several years in Kansas. And then I went to the University of Kansas for a year. Then the University of Central Oklahoma, so I did a lot of transferring, but it was never the big juggernaut dream or school that I wanted to go to. I never obtained it. But so thankful I obtained Christ in the process.

Jennifer Rothschild: Really, you lost nothing compared to what you gained.

Rashawn Copeland: Yes, amen.

Jennifer Rothschild: So, kind of tell me then, Rashawn, you've got quite a past. I mean, you know, lots of us do. And so, because of that, we can feel tempted to let that past become part of our label and our identity. So tell me how you believe God renames us when we begin to follow Him.

Rashawn Copeland: Love it. Like, one thing that I discovered throughout my walk with Christ and when I came to Him is that we have a new identity when we come to Him. Jesus said it so plainly in John, chapter 8, verse 32. He says, "You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." And I think, you know, one of the big parts of knowing the truth is knowing who we are in Him. And, out of that, you know, the first thing I think of is that I'm accepted. All my life, I've been running and seeking and searching for acceptance in all the wrong places. But to know that God loves me, you know, right where I am, however I am right now, is the most amazing thing ever. So I live out of this place, this position where I'm God's child, rather than trying to be an orphan, chasing everything in this world, you know, becoming a slave to this world. I can rest easy in God, knowing that, yeah, I'm His. And that changes everything for me.

Jennifer Rothschild: It does change everything. And, because that truth has changed everything, you have been changed. And I have seen how God uses you to be part of the change in other people's lives because He's given you really an interesting ministry, I believe, on social media. So talk to us, just a little bit, about that, because you're kind of like a social media pastor.

Rashawn Copeland: Yeah. Yeah. And I've been learning a lot over the years, and I never, you know, one, I think it's a miracle that you know, I'm a follower of Christ. But I also think it's even a bigger miracle that I'm like an online pastor.

Jennifer Rothschild: I know.

Rashawn Copeland: I've never seen this coming, but again, I'm so undeserving of it. But it's a great opportunity for me to meet people where they are because God met me where I was on social media. I don't know if you heard that part of my story, Jennifer, but when I was off in L.A., you know, chasing fame, money, fortune, I was a hype man for a guy named Soulja Boy, who's a really well-known rap artist. And I was doing all these TikTok things. I began to use all my knowledge and expertise and, you know, sort of wisdom I was gaining on social media for myself. And I just remember at my lowest moment when I was on the verge of suicide, about to take my life, a girl, the only Christian girl that I was friends with on social media had posted something in my darkest hour, and I'll never forget the impact that it made on me. So I can't help but to share what I experience on social media because I'm just so compelled to do it. I can't do nothing without really extending that.

Jennifer Rothschild: I love that because it is a place where many people go when they're seeking, and to have a voice like yours that not only can speak truth but can love truthfully is huge because we can throw around cheap words. But with the way you kind of shepherd people through their relationships with God, I just love what God has done. And there's a real need out there because I think a lot of people have a hard time accepting that God really loves them. It's hard for them to believe that. Why do you think that is?

Rashawn Copeland: I think, totally because, you know, I speak to people all the time and even in my own experience, but at times we see the world as an unsafe place, which it can be apart from God, and it will be almost guaranteed to be unsafe apart from Christ. And, along with it, being so isolated is another thing. Amid all those thoughts, of like to be withdrawn emotionally from any intimate relationships is probably one of the most dangerous things we could do. And I think what's important is if we let people know that they're seen, they're known, that they're loved. And allow people to really experience this love of Christ that has been freely given to us and really just lay our own lives down for others, I think that changes everything because that's when people understand the hope that's found in Him and Him alone, you know?

Jennifer Rothschild: Yeah.

Rashawn Copeland: So, that's what I think. It's just a lot of we live in an unsafe world and everyone feels isolated right now. I just think there's no greater time to share that love and that hope in a real way.

Jennifer Rothschild: Yeah, and it does. When a person feels safe, then they can deal with the vulnerability that they feel to accept that love of God, you know, so I see you doing that. And so I'm curious about you personally with your story because you've had some hard and ugly parts of your story, right? But you've seen God use those for good. So tell me about that. And then what would you say to somebody who is struggling with their own story and to see how God can use the ugly and hard parts of their story in other people's lives?

Rashawn Copeland: Definitely, great question, Jennifer. So specifically, you know, I want someone out there to know truly that like no matter how far you feel from God, you're not too far to be reached. You're not too broken to be fixed. You're not too unworthy to be loved. Like all of our stories and even the characters of the Bible were all met where they were, and they weren't necessarily in these perfect places with a perfect condition. Matter of fact, none of them were. If you think about it, like Noah was a "drunk," and you got Abraham, who was "a liar." They all have these little labels that were attached to them. The Apostle Paul was murdering Christians. But, God in His great love, you know, it's not what we do, but Him demonstrating His love for us all. While we're sinners, Christ died for us. So, He's always coming after us before we're ready. And that's the greatest thing about, you know, Jesus whispers because He's close to us. Like the enemy's loud, he's trying to get us to go astray from God, away from God, telling us that God's distant, He's not close. But God, He truly does whisper to us. He's always speaking to us. But the question is: Can we hear Him amid all the chaos and crisis right now? And do we want to?

Jennifer Rothschild: Speaking of that chaos and crisis, that something I wanted to ask you about. Because we're in such a, gosh, we're in such a polarized time in our nation, and you talk a lot in your book about the importance of practicing kindness, you know, especially to those that we disagree with. So talk to us about that.

Rashawn Copeland: So, you know what has been huge? One of the greatest things is to have brothers and sisters around me, even my wife, and, you know, buddies in the world that I'm in right now doing books and influencing and just pastoring, shepherding through just the community that's found in the body. The unity that will not only tell you what you want to hear but tell you what you need to hear. So I think that's a big difference between being nice and being kind. But one of the greatest things I've taken from it is that there's nothing greater than a word that's spoken in truth and love, you know, and that's just something that's encouraged me so much and helped me grow. It's helped me grow into the man of God I am today and still growing, you know.

But I think God, it's His words, you know, as far as the commandments, the Ten Commandments. I would run away from those things years ago, you know, and I would totally be like, what is the point of following this stuff. But now I absolutely love that the commandments don't mince words because it actually protects and it helps guides our lives. So, when those were written, God was being very kind to us because He cared for us. And I think in the same way, if we can just open up our mouths to our loved ones and be kind to them, whether it's your dad or uncle, you know, have an alcohol addiction or, with me personally, I had a brother who had to come to me and just ask me, was I taking care responsibilities and not allowing ministry to get before family? And, you know, I need these men of God around me to just speak, you know, speak not only who I am, but who I am destined to be. Yes, it's just so important.

Jennifer Rothschild: I love that. You know, I used to think, Rashawn, that, you know, there's the Scripture that talks about in John that Jesus was full of grace and truth. And I guess in my little feeble brain, I kind of thought like half grace, half truths and revolutionized my thinking when I realized, no, He was 100 percent grace and a hundred percent truth, not either or but both at the same time. And that's what you're talking about when we can. That's kindness. That's being who God has called us to be currently and speaking to the man, to the woman that God is calling us to be. I just I got to say, I love this. I love it.

OK, so I got to ask you one last question. Your book is called Start Where You Are. And I love it, by the way. And so here's my question to you. How can somebody take their next step of faith right now, no matter where they are, how can they start when they are?

Rashawn Copeland: I love that question. I love that question. I would say very similar like David, one of my favorite people in the Bible is David, because he was just so authentic with God. He didn't hide, you know. You know that the darker side, you know, of what was on the inside, you know, he shared everything in fearless, vulnerability at times of what he was going through in one of my favorite psalms is Psalms 51 where he well, actually I may it may be 40, 51 and 40, but 40 is what I want to talk about now. But he said, I cried out to the Lord and He heard my cry and He lifted me up out of the mud and mire, the slimy pit and He gave me a firm place to stand and put a new song in my mouth and a new hymn of praise to our God. But I absolutely love the fact that he just cried out to God. And when we cry out to God, I would just say, acknowledge your pain, acknowledge your brokenness and, you know, just surrender it over to the Lord today, whatever that is, because the Lord not only will hear you, but He'll respond to that because He loves a broken and a contrite heart, you know, those who are crushed. He came for you like there's areas that we may want to hold on to, but the Lord is saying surrender it over to Me. You know, even if you're not where you want to be, even if you're not where you thought you'd be, as you look around, you know, just be grateful and gather that brokenness and bring it over to God. You know, cast your cares upon Him because He cares for you.

KC Wright: Well said, my brother, well said. God does care for us and remember, He sees who you are, not just where you are. So if you aren't where you want to be, it's OK. Just call out to Jesus. He is there with you waiting to pick up the broken pieces.

Jennifer Rothschild: And we all need to be reminded that those mercies that He gives us, they are new every morning. So don't let where you are today feel like it's a prophecy for tomorrow. You can start fresh, you can start where you are. In fact, that's the name of Rashawn's book. Start where you are and you need it so you can win a copy of his book through my Instagram. You would just go to Instagram to my profile at @JenRothschild, or you can go to the show notes at 413Podcast.com/ 130.

KC Wright: His story proves that nothing is more powerful than our God. So remember, whatever you face, wherever you find yourself, you can start fresh. You can cast your cares on God because you can do all things through Christ who gives you supernatural strength. I can.

Jennifer Rothschild: I can.

KC Wright: And you can.

Jennifer Rothschild: OK, what do you have for lunch? I'm hungry.

KC Wright: Me too.

Jennifer Rothschild: I just started like thinking. I was very focused.

KC Wright: You know what I'm craving?

Jennifer Rothschild: What?

KC Wright: I'm craving Chipotle.

Jennifer Rothschild: Oh, I love Chipotle.

KC Wright: Well, I have to choose somewhere else besides Chick-Fil-A. I could eat that every day.